Know Yourself and Who You are Not - The Ground Work

The Gap in Tech Leadership

"Women are still not making it to the top ranks of tech leadership—allyship is one way to help them get there.

This is unfortunately a sad reality, and it highlights a gap in tech leadership, where women only make up 30% of the workforce, and still face significant barriers in reaching top leadership positions. 

Despite 75% of senior IT leaders claiming a commitment to diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI), their leadership teams include less than 25% women and people of color. This raises the question of what kind of support is effective and how allyship can help."

 _{Source: Deloitte}

Myths about Women in Leadership

Some men I have talked with believe that women do not want leadership positions, and that they often turn these positions down when they are offered. As a woman with over two decades in tech, I question this belief.

Many women I know are eager to have leadership roles, but feel the culture does not suit them. For example, they are unwilling to sacrifice their personal lives for a job. This leads me to question: Is it truly necessary for leaders to have work-life imbalance?  Why is this culture accepted and left unchallenged? Could these expectations influence the choices women make, and indirectly strengthen the dominance of men in leadership roles? While I for sure do not have all the answers, it seems clear to me that the issue is not lack of interest in leadership. There are other, less talked about aspects of the leadership culture women find unappealing. 

The Challenge of Conforming to Masculine Leadership Styles

I also believe that it is quite challenging for women in tech to get to leadership positions due to the existing lack of gender diversity, and perhaps linked to the sacrificial leadership culture previously discussed. I have observed that women work hard to succeed, and they often feel pressured to adopt a leadership style that is perceived as more masculine than feminine. 

This might mean being more assertive than they are comfortable with, or putting aside the traditionally feminine values of empathy, collaboration and human connection. This perceived pressure can discourage women who wish to lead in a way that feels true to their own values and personality. 

The Role of Vulnerability in Leadership

The first time I heard Brené Brown's TED Talk 'The Power of Vulnerability' was in 2018, many years after it had been published. Since then, I have read many of her books and use her teachings in my leadership coaching.

In my coaching sessions, I have noticed that many leaders focus on immediate tasks and the doing of their work, often overlooking the importance of vulnerability. This quality, which Brené Brown highlights as essential for authentic and genuine leadership, is often missing in the male-dominated tech environments.

From my experience, promoting emotional agility and vulnerability could help leaders, regardless of gender, to create a more inclusive and supportive work environment. However, I have observed that in such a setting, it is challenging for female leaders to express vulnerability without risking their professional image, even when it could benefit their teams and projects.

Embracing Femininity and Authentic Leadership

I believe it is crucial for female leaders in tech to embrace their femininity, and I encourage men to support this by becoming true allies—not the kind that overstep boundaries, an issue I unfortunately have faced, but allies who genuinely foster authenticity. This means promoting vulnerability, understanding emotions, and welcoming the unknown.

Regardless of gender, it is important to embrace our true selves and acknowledge what we are, and what we choose not to be. In doing the groundwork for your leadership style, I advocate for a deep, introspective approach that allows you to fully integrate and accept all aspects of who you are, both in your personal and your professional life.

Consider Coaching for Leadership Development

If you are considering coaching to re-define your leadership style, I invite you to answer a few questions here.  I will follow up to arrange a chemistry call where we will explore your unique challenges, desires, and see how coaching can be a support for you in your journey.